don't know what to write about that would even interest anyone in reading this. things are crazy lately but i've heard that the best way to get things out is to either just say it or write it..so, guess i'll write it  and if someone reads it then fine..if not.. that's fine too.


right now.... God has removed people from my life and caused me to be in a position of only having HIM to depend upon. This is hard for me especially since i have trust issues that go way back........i try, i fall, then i just want to give up because i don't see that i will just ever make it or ever get it right. How many of you feel like that>? it says in the word that "the joy of the Lord is your strength"..what joy, i don't think i have ever had joy in my life so then what do you do with that? I feel like i am just rambling,but, maybe if i do it enough then i will find a way through the muck and mire of my life where i can get to a point where i can think straight.......        

why do  people really only run to Jesus when everything is going wrong or falling apart? when things are alright, he gets sent to the back seat and doesn't get thought of much until your whole world just collapses........ what do u do then............i don't know where i am going with this but how do u change y our whole character makeup  when u are so de pressed that u can't think straight.........nothing gets done...attitude stinks..........everything around you gets so out of sorts hat you want to pull your head out or choke the nearest person...............what do you do?  i'll try and come back tomorrow..................